stress
i dun know what's wrong with me totally. i am just feeling fu*cking stress over this sem. i am so not confident of scoring. i am really not. i dun know why am i feeling so insecure. i hope exam will be over soon while on the other hand, i dread the feeling of being in a transition state of being a student to becoming a employee.
so many things have happen recently, and i guess i have changed quite a bit. not really the same meishan as the past. this is not a good thing nor a bad thing. just that, i am also adapting to the changes in me. i'm still confused over who i really am now and what my thoughts are. i've lost myself in the process. and i begin not to understand myself more and more.
life. what is it all about? studies? NEVER! it is just a small part of your "precious" life. in the first place, why am i using " " to emphasis on the word precious???? i guess life is pretty an irony thingy. precious or worthless? since everyone's ending is the same- back to ashes. so who cares what the damn glory or lousy your life is? cuz they rmb? i dun think so. people live on. indeed, memories exist. but, how long can they last? or how frequent will they be? in the first place, the person must be important to you for you to rmb him. but in the first place, how impt are u to how many pple?
life. what is more important? the mean of living to reaching your death or the ending of your death. key note is that the conclusion is always DEATH. so, does it all matter how u are leading your life in the first place since you are so going to die one day? perhaps u are right, if u are living a happy life, u enjoy the process more. but guess wad, happy moments always pass really fast. that means, u are just accelerating your time to die. wad's next? then u must be thinking of living your live poorly, being meaningless. it is den, time will pass slowly and u will seem to live longer. but guess wad, right then, u will be feeling like shit and u just wanna die fast. so the point is that, life leads to death. and i guess, that's why heaven gives us ups and downs in life. to make us suffer? to enjoy? you decide for yourself.
life. is so confusing. perhaps, i am just thinking too much. perhaps all is already done and planned for. perhaps, this is my last post. perhaps, this is the last time i am feeling so confused. perhaps, this is going to be no more perhaps.
but who knows? life definitely don't know. and, i definitely still don't know life.
so many things have happen recently, and i guess i have changed quite a bit. not really the same meishan as the past. this is not a good thing nor a bad thing. just that, i am also adapting to the changes in me. i'm still confused over who i really am now and what my thoughts are. i've lost myself in the process. and i begin not to understand myself more and more.
life. what is it all about? studies? NEVER! it is just a small part of your "precious" life. in the first place, why am i using " " to emphasis on the word precious???? i guess life is pretty an irony thingy. precious or worthless? since everyone's ending is the same- back to ashes. so who cares what the damn glory or lousy your life is? cuz they rmb? i dun think so. people live on. indeed, memories exist. but, how long can they last? or how frequent will they be? in the first place, the person must be important to you for you to rmb him. but in the first place, how impt are u to how many pple?
life. what is more important? the mean of living to reaching your death or the ending of your death. key note is that the conclusion is always DEATH. so, does it all matter how u are leading your life in the first place since you are so going to die one day? perhaps u are right, if u are living a happy life, u enjoy the process more. but guess wad, happy moments always pass really fast. that means, u are just accelerating your time to die. wad's next? then u must be thinking of living your live poorly, being meaningless. it is den, time will pass slowly and u will seem to live longer. but guess wad, right then, u will be feeling like shit and u just wanna die fast. so the point is that, life leads to death. and i guess, that's why heaven gives us ups and downs in life. to make us suffer? to enjoy? you decide for yourself.
life. is so confusing. perhaps, i am just thinking too much. perhaps all is already done and planned for. perhaps, this is my last post. perhaps, this is the last time i am feeling so confused. perhaps, this is going to be no more perhaps.
but who knows? life definitely don't know. and, i definitely still don't know life.
posted by mEishAn at 4:18 AM
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